Category Archives: Choice

When was the last time you Stood Up?

StandUpForYourself-WorldMaySeemUpsideDown – Thank you OJ, for your picture!

Sounds weird, but just ask yourself, when did you stand for yourself, for your rights, for your feelings, for your identity or for justice to yourself? There’s a very, very thin line of demarcation between being a rebel or adamant and standing-up for yourself! Let’s go on it in detail, since every coin has two sides, we shall see what are they:

Ever tried saying ‘no’ to your boss?

“Standing-up for yourself”, means, saying ‘No’ to anything that you cannot compromise on, or saying ‘Yes’ to anything that is a must-have for you! In simple words, if you feel something is not right, yet you are allowing it to happen, then you are not standing-up for yourself. We Indians, most of us, are taught to accept people, their behavior and circumstances as they are and by accepting them, we are prepared to let their behavior dictate us. At work place, most people try to fit in the work in their personal time, the work that can wait until next day, yet people don’t say no, just to please their seniors or to ensure they are not giving way to competition. And then this becomes a culture! When one of the employee says ‘no’ to the work that isn’t urgent at that moment, becomes the ‘bad guy’ in the eyes of superiors. However, there are managers who are leaders, who understand the difference between reality and reasons. If you are true in what you do, you communicate well on your needs and you fulfill the needs of your job, saying ‘no’ never harms, rather creates a stronger relationship between colleagues.

How about ‘no’ in a relationship?

Are you in a relationship or have you been in one? What not people lose in the name of love? It is very easy to accept any amount of restrictions, compromises and sacrifices just because we fear not to hurt the person we love, we fear losing them and in ‘want of’ having the person, we do not say ‘no’ to the words and deeds that annoy us the most. And when this mountain of ‘wish I could say what I feel’ heaps up, either it quakes and breaks us within or a volcano erupts and breaks the relationship. Either way it’s we who lose! Instead, if we understand ourselves better and learn to say ‘no’ to what is not acceptable, would it not be easier to communicate and make the other person understand this? Would it not make it easier to decide whether you really want to live with a person who does not accept your ‘no’? Would it not be easy to end a relationship before it begins on false hopes? I am writing this blog because very recently, I realized that I must say ‘no’ to many deeds of people around me, whom I have been accepting externally but internally I have been hoping that they understand my needs and desires. Most of us are lucky enough that we are not put to such a test where you have to decide whether you want to be happy now, for the moment or you want to be happy for life? I had never faced such a situation before, but now that I have, I am all the more confident. I am very clear of what I want and what I don’t. This doesn’t mean, I don’t compromise on things, I certainly do where and when needed, provided, the compromise is for the better for a person who deserves it more than me, at that moment, Yes’ doesn’t hurt!

‘Yes’ doesn’t hurt!

When we speak of standing-up for ourselves, should we not consider our needs over our wants? Its crazy to work hard/smart for an organization where your efforts are not recognized. Its taxing to be in a relationship where, you are always a giver! Unless you have attained a state of ‘giving without anything in return’, yes you might be happy, but for most of us, I know, are not at that level yet. So, be it a relationship between a parent & child, teacher & a student, husband & wife, employer & employee, siblings or lovers, you cannot be happy if you do not communicate your needs and wants, and if you are not ready to give what the other person needs. Saying ‘yes’ to your needs, communicating them and fulfilling the needs of others, only, can make you happy!

Stand-up, if not now, when?

In whichever walk of life you are, stand-up for yourself, say ‘no’ to what is not for you, say ‘yes’ to what you can and lead a healthy life. Life may seem upside down when you start listening to yourself and voicing it, remember these voices that arise when you stand for yourself, are the seeds of joy for a better tomorrow. Choices you make today, make the reality you live everyday! Days, months and years pass-by waiting and hoping your life will change, tell me, if not you, who will speak for you, stand-up for you, to make your life better?

Follow OJ_Workouts to stay strong by clicking the link below:

https://www.instagram.com/oj_workouts/

तुझे तेरी दुनिया मुबारक

खुश होना चाहिए मुझे

आज वो ख़ुशी का दिन है
जिसका मुझे सदियों से इंतज़ार था |
पर मेरी खुशियां कुछ उलझ सी गयी हैं ||

जानता हूँ मेरी खुशियां मेरी रूह में हैं |
फिर भी रहता इंतज़ार उनकी एक झलक का,
एक मुलाकात नहीं..
एक पैगाम ही सही ||

अब दोष दूँ उन्हें कैसे..
जिन्हे हमसे मोहब्बत तो है
पर आशिकी नहीं |
दीवाना मैं उनका
उन्हें शायद मेरी याद भी नहीं आती ||

इक सुलझा मुकाम इस दिल में है |
उनकी उँगलियों मैं ज़िन्दगी उलझत्ति गयी..
सम्भालना चाहा
तो कच्चे धागे की तरह काट दिया |
अब सुलझे वो, दर्द मुझे खा गया ||

काश मैं ज़िन्दगी से कह पाता –
तू जुडी सब के साथ है,
तेरे बिना मैं नहीं..
मेरे बिना तेरा वजूद नहीं ||
तू गम दे, बक्श खुशियाँ,
जो तू मेरे साथ नहीं –
मेरी सांसें नहीं ||
मर मिटटून भी मैं कैसे ?
मेरे बिछड़ने का तुझे ग़म नहीं |
जीयूं भी मैं कैसे ?
न मेरे जीने की ख़ुशी तुझे,
न मेरे साथ की ज़रुरत तुझे |
तू जी रही अपने स्वार्थ से –

तुझे तेरी दुनिया मुबारक ||

Light Within!

Life does not end in darkness around you, it ends when there;'s darkness in you!
Life does not end in darkness around you, it ends when there;’s darkness in you!

 

Can you see? Then you are mentally impaired!

Trans Journey:

She said, ‘Sir, can you see?’, he added ‘Sir, this is your walking stick’, I responded ‘Uhh… no no…okay okay..’ Suddenly, the beautiful girl seemed a stranger, the boy holding the stick for me, a savior. What am I to do? Expect nothing of me, I see nothing.

Came from somewhere I know not, a girl who held my arm and soothed me to a very noisy place, [wait, did I say very noisy? Ahem…did not realize it was noisy until I could see], said she, ‘this is your first task, you have to cross the obstruction.’ I wondered, ‘don’t you see on my face, my trembling hands, the moment you shut my eyes and handed me the stick, I feel everything around an obstruction. I don’t know who you are, yet I let you hold onto me, because this is not my house and I know not, where to go. Not after you said ‘obstruction’ did I hit the stick on the floor and around, but the moment you handed it over to me. Because I know you are walking with your eyes that can see, see what may not seem an obstacle to you, the same pebble pricks me!‘ Is this the Human Instinct!

I slipped on the slope, felt the descend of the ramp, held myself upright, only a tinge of fear and doubt in my veins. Another girl held my hand now and uttered, ‘Sir, this is your money, a 10, a 50, a 100 and a 500.’ Instantly, my fingers caressed the notes, feeling them the way I never did, for the last 26 years. She ushered me to a table, I know not the shape, I hit it with the stick and escaped a dash, asking her, if I am at the right place or is the table by my side. ‘Buy a pack of cookies, toothbrush and a soap’ her voice bleak in my ear. My ears rose high to hear her right and I repeated, a pack of cookies, toothbrush and a soap? Once I started digging my hand in one of the boxes, a male voice said ‘there are 6 boxes’. Human brain is so wonderful and gracious, the feel of a toothbrush and a soap made me so euphoric and confident that my trembling voice was replaced by confidence.

Once again a new girl stepped in, asking me to buy ‘a shirt’ from the stand. I touched every garment, silky, satin, coarse and hanging. I exclaimed, it is women’s section. Gladly, she agreed and asked me to buy a garment for my girl friend. I measured the size with my palm stretching end to end, I know not the color and style, yet happy with my choice

A thin boy, wrapped my fingers around his arm and said, ‘lets go play football’. Never imagined in my wildest, play football in total darkness around me. A chime inside the ball alarmed me of the ball’s position and the claps from the goalee told me where to shoot! Yay, I kicked it right one after the other, which I wouldn’t have, if I could see.

My fears heaped in me, when she told me ‘we are in a restaurant, I’ll get you the menu’. Can someone tell me where’s the chair for me to sit, should I stand and eat? Swaying both my hands in all directions, I found a chair, in a different orientation, should I sit according to its position or should I turn it this way? I then found the table, placed myself slowly on the chair, moving me hands on the table, patting it, to find if something is there for me. My legs stretching little by little to stay at ease. I don’t know why, I moved my hands around and felt a girl sitting beside me on the left and a boy on the right. Then came a girl with the menu, reading it for us and to order, I had to remember the sequence to ensure I don’t miss any. Strangely, instead of the items appearing before my eyes, I felt my tongue mouth-watering, imagining the taste.

Insight:

Abey andha hai kya?? (Are you blind?)

Every time, when someone bumped into us, we for sure would have yelled the same, ‘are you blind?’.
Have we ever taken a moment to feel what the visually impaired feel? It’s a different world. We name it dark, we make it dark but on the contrary, it is full of life. When one of the senses stop working or feebly work, the others take responsibility of the completing the task. Unbelievably intelligent is the human body!

All through the 45 minute event of walking in the shoes of visually impaired, I experienced, fear, pain, joy, trust, success. Only question running in was ‘everything around is so settled, why do people complain?’

Having closed my external eyes, the eye within surfaced with life. Kudos to St. Xavier’s College and Viviana mall, Thane, for having thought on this and worked together to let everyone know how blocked our minds are!

Many people across the world have put together their thoughts and ideas to make life easy for the differently-abled by including them in their routine and thereby, inventing these gadgets:

Antarchakshu-1

These cards have pins that pop up for every character as per the Braile system.

2

Every line you see on the screen, gets transformed to Braile.

3

The gadget is moved on the newspaper / book and thus, it appears on screen and in Braile.

4

This one is Ruby. She is for the people who can feebly see. She works on the software named ‘Magic’, a product of Freedom Scientific.

6

Why don’t we help them?

7

Slender and sleek. It reads the text and transforms into audio. Excellent!

8

Kudos to the people who thought of this. Yes, life is fun in various angles.

9

How daring are you?

10

Now, that’s a news!!

Sad that these gadgets are made abroad and are very expensive that not many can afford. We all should do our best in gifting colors in lives of many.

‘Antarchakshu’ is the name of the event. Rightly, named – ‘The Light Within’.
I am happy for I am enlightened. A special appreciation to everyone involved in Antarchakshu and Viviana mall, to be the First Visually-Impaired Friendly mall.

Lets all extend our hearts of friendship with everyone and stop mourning about people and life.

I personally believe, ‘Life does not end in darkness around you, it ends when there’s darkness in you!’

I Choose To Be Happy :-)

It's by choice
It’s by choice

Very little did I know that being happy is a choice! People whom I came across, believed happiness is attributed to the fortunate.

When I see life in an apple, every piece is the same in everyone’s life, only the size varying. Then why are some happy and some aren’t? I’ve been through death of a beloved child, failed in competitions, bed-ridden for a while, and more.
If I grief for the departed soul, everyday would be a struggle. If I prolong the torment of pain in my body, knowing that it is now a part of me, I shall never smile. There are moments when people sound unpleasant, work seems torturing, slightest ignorance seems to penetrate the heart and mind. That one moment when negative emotions like anger, hatred, jealousy, envy, take birth, hit them on the point blank, say, ‘I choose to be happy’.

This picture posted here, is one among the everyday inspirational posts from my Mom’s friend Roma Aunty, on Facebook. This simple post has evolved me. Reality is when things don’t work as desired, instead of cribbing, fighting or planning, just saying ‘I choose to be happy’ works wonders.

One choice that can make or break things. One choice that can hurl or swirl your relationships. One choice that would heal your illness. One choice that can spread joy or pain. Just one choice. What do you choose?

Thanking Roma Aunty for the wonderful post.

I choose to be happy 🙂

Justify Chirsty.

Said. Did.
He Said. He Did.

Christy. Christy chose peace.

Life is but a game of choices. The path unfolds as the decisions influence. The remote control is thus, in our hands. Mockingly, when one is set to tread onto the road of one’s choice, it divides, thereby again leaving with choices to make. So, is it one’s choice that leads to a path or is it the path that provides choices?

At every point of doubt, life presents itself in two roads – one that we take and one is left inexperienced. The choice is governed by the need to meet the end goal. The game changes. New choices breed newer goals.
What was Christy’s goal?
This is Christy’s story in a sentence –

A 20 year, very cheerful, football playing, young boy from a well-to-do family of a grandmother whose children live in a foreign country, leaving behind their son to live with the old lady, to look after her during the summer vacations while courting a girl, his age, in the college, only to hang himself on a ceiling fan, toes touching the floor, just to prove himself, she meant the world to him.


Human is of two kinds – Living for Self & living for Others.
The former would end his life only if his ego is hurt while the latter would for two reasons.

A soul that caters to the need of anyone apart from self, seldom catering for his own needs, is in existence for others. Such a soul can depart the body only if it is for the good of anyone else. Martyr’s are the best to quote.

The other reason being, at one particular point of time, when one has lived enough for the happiness of else, thinking of what is left for himself, with the focus on one supreme thing, realizes there is nothing worthy to live for, he chooses peace; the stillness of life.

Christy scuffled when she refrained. His thoughts quaked.

Holding in rain,
In the sunshine,
It is just you,
Like the Lotus divine.

Your dream is mine,
To make it true;
Stand on my feet,
O’ girl!

For Sun, is the sky!
Land has no fish,
It is just you,
To make me feel I’m alive.

Don’t say no.
Lest you, I am zero.
If not you,
I breathe none.

Everything he did, was for her. When she deceived her promises, he still tried. Tried until he broke. He lived for her. He died for himself. That one fateful moment when he answered the void seeking to realize if there is anything left for him, that one journey of transition from living for others to living for self, flashed a black hole. For 20 years he lived for others, the 20 seconds he lived for himself, focused at his supremacy – his girl, he found nothing worth.

For once, he lived for himself.
Christy chose peace.
He said. He did. He took the road less traveled and made all the difference.